"Mom, can I have your phone. I need to check my email." (Huh?)
To her imaginary friend, Max: "Max, you are in time out! You're not listening, Max." (bends down to what I can only assume is on Max's level.) "Are you ready to be a good listener? Okay, give me a hug."
To Jake: "Ohhh bud, you spit up. We don't spit up!"
In other news, we are starting Jake on solids. Our first encounter with rice cereal was a big thumbs up...
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